If YOU want LOW or NO PAY...READ!

Some helpful tips for those looking to hire creative freelancers for LOW or NO PAY:


LOW PAY:

Don't say "the pay is low BUT we will have MORE work for you if it works out!"
WHY? Who wants MORE LOW PAY?
Instead say "if this works out, we will have other HIGHER paying work!"
See what I mean?


NO PAY:

Don't say "there is NO PAY BUT we will give you CREDIT!"
WHY? Credit is AUTOMATIC and goes without saying, it's industry standard.
Instead say "unfortunately there is NO PAY, BUT, the project is REALLY great creatively, so you will get to do very compelling work for your reel and you will meet and work with some great people who are driven to succeed!"
See what I mean?


IF YOU CAN'T say either of these things, you probably should not be expecting LOW or NO pay from qualified and talented freelancers.
This IS a give and take, not ALL take!

• Location: Santa Monica

Crew Jobs

Is it just me or are all the offered rates off by one decimal point? This is utterly 100% MFing crazy.

When craigslist just started, mandy.com was still viable. I got real jobs on TV and smaller ( under $1M) films from both. and real corporate gigs that paid a grand a day.

Now, Mandy.com is bullshit and CL is.... Unpronounceable. ....Unbelievable,,, does anyone have words for what's going on ?

We also see the current magic recurring posts from the ass hat who DEMANDS a DP who's shot a $10M+ feature or better. That's cool. There are 20 agencies in town who book those. May I suggest Montana Artists, Dattner Dispoto, and The Skouras Agency for starters ? They all turned me down and I have had 2 theatrical features so their DPs must be good. Or maybe it's because they all use 5k cameras like the ones mentioned in your ad. Never mind that only one of those cameras is 5K.

But what do I know ? Apparently nothing. I keep coming back to this toilet.

Grandpa used to ask " if you have WANT in one hand and SHIT in the other, which hand fills up first ?"

• Location: L.A.

DPs - 7Ds and BURGER KING

   All DPs have to look forward to on this "CL crew gigs section" is having complete irresponsible, wannabe filmmakers posting for highly-skilled DPs with their own gear, or worse yet, using their 7Ds with no professional lighting gear, or sound gear and offering
a whopping $40.00 a day.. Now that's a big whopper!!!

Hell, you can make $8.00 bucks an hour at Burger King.
This forum and gig section has been dragged completely into the dirt!
The days of making $300.00 a day and shooting a great script
are long gone!

Long live the wannabes who have ruined it for everyone!
Congratulations! Your selfishness has conquered the film industry
and destroyed any hope for real filmmakers who care.

• Location: Lost Angeles
• Compensation: one sad dime  

For the hiring of sound mixers

   Sound mixers get a bum deal. We have to invest over $10k to get decent gear and enough of it to be able to handle the demands of what production wants. We provide a valuable service that is even more important than your picture. Your film has dialogue, people want to hear it and hear it clearly. We try to do that for you despite poor locations, poor wardrobe choices, and sometimes, ridiculous shot composition. A camera crew is exactly that, a crew. Operator, 1st AC, 2nd AC. If there's no 2nd AC then there's damn sure a 1st. Sound mixers are apparently expected to do the job of two people and get paid peanuts for it. In the LA area, the absolute minimum for our services should be $350 per 12 hour day with $250 for a kit fee. Base minimum.

Any asshole with a DSLR can call themselves a DP and show up on set and get paid decently because they have a camera. A 744t recorder is nearly twice the cost of a 5d markIII and a 788 is more so. On top of that, producers want at least 2 wireless, a shotgun mic with great rejection, and comteks so they can hear and complain. Cameras have gotten cheaper but sound equipment hasn't. Don't pay less than minimum wage. $100 a day or $150 a day is garbage. If you have name talent you can afford a rate. You don't go into a store and say, "I want to buy this pair of pants that costs $40 bucks but I've only got $10 so thats what I'm gonna pay you." You want good sound? We are an investment. We buy more equipment so your movie can sound better and we'll work with you often if you do shit right. We can't do that if we're not even making our rent. Everyone has to eat and have a place to stay and have gas to put in our car.

We help people want to watch your movie. A film with terrible sound and a gorgeous picture is still unwatchable, a film with mediocre picture and excellent sound will be watched in its entirety (provided the story is worth it).

Don't insult production sound mixers or boom operators (two separate jobs, by the way) by wanting to pay $150 for a 12 hour day, subway for lunch, and no equipment fee. $350 +$250 kit fee is minimum. If we really really like you, we might do it for less if we're bored. But don't insult us by calling it a job.

• Location: all of LA
• Compensation: $350 + $250 kit fee minimum 

RE: NEED a DP (for FOOD&DRINK)

Date: 2012-09-24, 12:01PM PDT

---

Whoever posted the AD below, I truly admire his/her guts...
This guy is asking for any DP out there with 5D or 7D (notice that a specific type of camera is required. It can't be Panasonic HVX200 because it's too outdated), and he generously offers...

FOOD AND DRINKS WILL BE AVAILABLE.

Wow, I have a 5D so I'm entitled for food and drinks. That's a fair deal because I'm feeling hungry and thirsty lately. I'm wondering if I throw in my 7D as well, does he add a desert, maybe?

Someone, please advise him that he has a much better chance to find a DP if he waits at the US border for people successfully crossing from Mexico because they are very hungry and thirsty, spending
3 nights in the desert. Of course they all own 5D or 7D (some smugglers even own fast prime lenses)...

Original Post:
I am looking for a DP who has and can work a 5D and 7D camera. We are shooting a webisode and need extra crew. Food and drinks will be available. Great set for networking and meeting new people and perfecting your craft. Be a great samaritan! Looking to shoot within the next week or two!

• Location: Homeless Shelter
• Compensation: Food and drinks, possibly desert, too.  
  

How to get Flagged (a Tutorial)

Date: 2012-09-20, 2:10AM PDT

Start off by offering NO PAY... and requiring that the potential slave have thousands of dollars of Camera, Audio, Lighting or Makeup Kit
as a requirement of the job.
(Remember, those of us that use this equipment probably paid a pretty penny to acquire it... I know I paid out
quite bit for my Camera Gear... so consider that when you look for free rentals)

Try asking a Camera Rental House for free gear...

If you pay, offer an insultingly low amount, like ANYTHING below Minimum Wage for a 12 hour day...
(which is currently $64/8 Hours, $88/10 Hours, $112 for 12 Hours in most of California)

offer IMDB credits and food as the only pay, as if you have some magical ability to grant IMDB credits that no one else has...
(I can create a bogus IMDB page that will get me an interview with Martin Scorsese in mere minutes... so, IMDB means nothing)

Use the following keywords (all as reasons to accept low or no pay)
"Great Crew"
"Fun Production"
"Labor of Love"
"Pro Crew, all donating their time."
"Award Winning Director, In Between Projects"
"A-List Talent all working for free"
"No Pay on this one, but future jobs will have pay." (Assuming you really DO have a next job)
(none of these will pay the rent, or Auto Insurance, real money, will)

Sound like a total Douchebag, and require a headshot for a below the line crew position that will never appear on camera...
(that screams "I only want to hire hot females" that I can hit on while they are working for me, for free...)

THAT, is how you get flagged... in case you haven't already figured that out...

• Location: Production Land!
• Compensation: Yes, you will pay ME!!   

Come work for me for FREE! It'll be AWESOME!

Date: 2012-09-20, 8:30PM PDT

Hi! I'm a douche and I'm making an ULB feature and need crew! I need all the positions filled so please, apply here, but please be advised, I'm only hiring professionals! In order to apply you need:

1. At least 5 years of experience

2. A resume/reel/IMDB link that's gonna knock my socks off

3. A credit card, because I'm probably gonna make you pay for stuff yourself...but keep those receipts, because I "swear" I'll pay you back...

4. A great car...or better yet, a truck...because I'm gonna need you to help me move stuff...

5. An iron stomach because I'm only going to get the crappiest and cheapest food to feed my crew...when I feed you at all.

It's gonna be a blast. This is a total passion project so I'm trying to make this for as little as possible (free) and make as much money off of it as possible. I can't pay anyone because I don't have the money...or actually, I do have the money but it's so much more fun to spend on myself. The whole thing is gonna shoot for 15 days out in BFE and you have to drive yourself (good thing you have that big car). Oh, I'm not paying for gas so I hope you get good mileage! And by the way, can I catch a ride...I don't want to put the miles on my car if you're already headed out there.

You know what, I might just have another project in a few months/years/decades so working on this for free is just like a really long job interview and I "might" hire you again!

So, send me your info. Oh, headshots too...I need actors. And bank information...because like I said, I still need to buy stuff...

And if you're in college, even better...I'll give you college credits for that internship you need...you'll be working for production AND I'll make you my personal assistant so you can expect to pick up my laundry, check my voicemail/fb/email/twitter/pinterest/linkd/craigslist/eharmony accounts, pick up after my dogs (I have 12 Great Danes..hope you like fur) and babysit evenings and weekends for my two sociopathic children...

Copy (if I remember to burn the DVDs), Credit (forever in my heart because I'm not gonna take the time to put this on IMDB.COM) and my undying silent mockery of the fact that you're stupid enough to work for free.

Seriously guys? Let's get real. Shut down free projects...they're insulting to us all.

Location: Hollywood

Compensation: Hugs and unicorn farts.